poetry

I See Myself⭐

📅Dec 24, 2023 🏷featured poetry

I look in the mirror and I do not see myself. I put on makeup and I do not see myself. I look at old pictures and I do not see myself. I look at devices I’ve made and I see myself. I lose myself in code and I am myself. I search my files and I find myself. My neural pathways mirror the shape of the runtime environment. My intentions externalized as silicon.

Poems from October 2023

📅Oct 14, 2023 🏷poetry

i find myself in the cycle again, at a high point but wondering when, it all crashes, ruins, begin again. how can i enjoy what is fleeting, when what is coming will be devasatating why risk trying, scrutinized by eyes prying, just keep lying. caught in a local minimum, feeling stretched thin again, dopamine to the maximum, stuck in my head again mind reduced to sparks and juice, reactive never proactive.

Poems from July 2023

📅Jul 21, 2023 🏷poetry

Dreams achieved, powerless to pursue them. Potential unlimited, kinetic unreachable. Care what you think, no thought for self-care. Time passing me, me passing up moments time and time again. Genuine laughter, deeply unsatisfied. Once again I find myself Disturbed by the fact that Cause leads to Effect Leads to past set in Stone. Desire for care-freeness Leads to policing desires Leads to care-fullness Leads to shame. Hunger for idealism Chasing the illusion Never letting it be What it is.

Identity Reflection (a Poem I Wrote at Bridge DC)

📅Dec 24, 2019 🏷poetry

This is copied from my journal that I kept during Bridge DC in summer 2019. More info about Bridge DC. I thought I heard my name called in the babbling crowd, but it was just an echo. I thought I saw my face reflected in the shifting mass, but it was just an illusion. I thought I sensed my purpose in the wavering sea, but it was just a manifesto. I took a pause to listen and be still, Away from the voices pulling me every direction but upward.

My Story by Johan Vandegriff (told through limericks)⭐

📅Oct 6, 2017 🏷featured poetry

Here are some limericks that I wrote for an assignment to tell my story. Johan is one quarter Lebanese, And three quarters white as swiss cheese. He’s spent so long in MoCo, That he’s started to go loco, And he plans to take a trip overseas. In 5th grade he became a Boy Scout, And liked to make fires and camp out. He advanced up in rank, Supportive family to thank, And got Eagle before the time ran out.